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Got People Around Who Make You Want to Quit? There Are Answers.

Drenda Keesee • Apr 08, 2019

“I wrote my resignation letter today,” Gary said, with tears in his eyes and trying to fight back the crushing disappointment in his voice.

Where did we go wrong?

We used to wake up every day so excited to build the vision God gave us. Now, we were tired, frustrated, and burnt out. We felt like failures.

If we were better leaders, people wouldn’t turn against us, right?

I thought we were the only ones dealing with these situations, but as we continued in ministry, I found out that we weren’t. Far from it.

Have you ever met a difficult person?

Somebody who was hard to please, critical, controlling, negative, or even rude? Did a few people come to mind as soon as you read that?

Some people treat us this way naively, simply motivated by feelings of jealousy, control, insecurity, or anger. Others do it compulsively. I call those people sharks.

We can all be sharks or demonstrate sharklike qualities from time to time, but these people do this so consistently and so maliciously that this isn’t an accident on their part—it’s a habit.

When we encounter sharks (note: you most often can’t tell a shark by their outward appearance), we often try to jump through hoops to keep them happy.

Been there, got the t-shirt, went back and got 500 more.

I hated making people unhappy!

If somebody was upset with me, my whole life came to a screeching halt. I spent SO much time trying to make people happy, but in the end, those very people left my life without a second thought. No matter how much I did, it never seemed to be enough for them.

“The only thing wrong with trying to please everyone is that there’s always at least one person who will remain unhappy—you.” —Elizabeth Parker

I felt heartbroken, confused, and even depressed at times.

But here’s where this story gets good! Through years of doing the WRONG things, I discovered how to break free. I learned the powerful principles that allowed me to start successfully dealing with difficult people without losing my peace.

And if I did it, you can too!

Gary and I almost made a terrible mistake—giving up on ministry—because of sharks.

Don’t get that far down the path yourself.

Don’t even think about giving up on what God has called you to do or giving up on your dreams because of people. Don’t even think about quitting.

__________________________________________________________

If telling people no make you feel guilty…

If you feel paralyzed by a fear of rejection, judgment, or trying to keep people from being upset with you…

If you’re burnt out in business and tempted to give up, all because of people…

If you feel bad for having nice things…

If you love to help others, but find it hard to accept help yourself…

If you’ve felt used, intimidated, or criticized by people…

If any of those sound like you, GET READY to discover something that could change the way you deal with people forever.

There are answers!

It’s time to master the art of dealing with difficult people in every area of your life.

Request your c opy of Drenda’s newest book, Shark Proof: How to Deal with Difficult People today!

 

 

By Gary Keesee 10 Apr, 2024
Reading Time 2 mins 13 secs – In John 6, we read the story of Jesus feeding 5,000 people with five loaves of bread and two fish. Do you know it? It’s where we see Jesus teaching the disciples how to release the Kingdom of God into the earth realm. Basically, a large crowd was following Jesus, listening to Him teach, and watching Him perform miracles. It got to a point where the people needed to eat, and Jesus asked the disciples what they planned to feed the people. Of course, Jesus knew the disciples would freak out. They couldn’t feed 5,000 people. In fact, they started talking about how it would take more than half a year’s wages to buy just a bite for that many people. Jesus was teaching the disciples, and He was teaching us— the Kingdom of God has all the answers you need . How can you release the Kingdom of God into your life? Here are the five steps Jesus took. 1. Look at what you have. Jesus asked the disciples what they had to feed the people. What do you have in your life that you can give God to work with? Jesus multiplied bread into bread and fish into fish. What do you need multiplied in your life? Find some of it. That’s your seed. Also, remember that money can be named. You don’t sow money to believe for more paper or digital money. Money represents your life and can be named to be the thing you need multiplied. 2. Make sure you’re in faith. “To have faith is to be sure of the things we hope for, to be certain of the things we cannot see” (Hebrews 11:1, GNT). You have to know how to judge whether or not you’re in faith. How? Do you have the right picture? When you close your eyes, what do you see? Do you see yourself with the thing you’re believing for? Can you defend your position? Why do you believe it? Prove it! Because you can be sure that between the “Amen” and the “There it is!” the enemy is going to contend for it, so you better be able to defend it. Do you have joy, expectancy, and peace? Are you in agreement with your spouse? 3. Confess over what you have, and release it in faith. Be specific. Say exactly what you’re believing for and release the seed to God. 4. Get the plan from God. Be ready for new direction, new ideas, and new concepts by revelation from the Holy Spirit. Carry a notepad and a pen. Write everything down. 5. Act quickly! When God gives you the plan, MOVE! It’s wise to have counselors and get wisdom, but you need to act swiftly on any direction you receive from the Holy Spirit.
By Gary Keesee 13 Mar, 2024
Reading Time 2 mins 34 secs – How can you make sure you’re equipped for the growth coming your way this year? Here are my 10 steps to posture yourself for opportunity and success. 1. Ask yourself how you’re handling your current responsibilities. Don’t run from your responsibilities. No matter where you are or what you’re doing, you should be a success. People will still see the evidence of God even if you think you’re in the wrong spot. 2. Detox your life of the things that keep you from having time to think. We live in a fast-paced world. There are plenty of things that can keep you distracted. But it’s in the moments that you stop to think that you’ll find ways to solve problems, and that’s where the opportunities are. So figure out what is consuming your time. Start saying no to some things. Find time to think. 3. Don’t hang around people who are always losing. I know people hit rough spots, but if the people in your life are chronically losing, it’s time to expand your circle. Hang around people who are better than you are, who don’t see things as impossible, and who have vision. It may be uncomfortable for you, but their influence will cause you to think differently. 4. Write down EVERY idea that you have, no matter how strange it seems. Most people filter opportunities and ideas through what they perceive their ability to be. This means most people discard ideas by the dozens because they don’t think they can do them. But God isn’t limited to what you know how to do. The ideas He gives you might seem so weird to you that you can’t process them fully. Write them down so you have time to think about them. 5. Research. Research. Repeat. You don’t need to know how to do something; you need to know how to learn how to do it. Research until you find what you’re looking for. 6. Count the cost before you jump. A lot of Christians hear God and jump out too soon, resulting in catastrophe. There are seasons for everything. God will prepare you for where He wants you to go. Be patient. 7. Always be in agreement with your spouse. Never, ever march out into battle without your spouse being in total agreement and your faith aligned. 8. Ask God for direction. Ask Him to help you, to show you where to go, and what to do. And always remember that prophecy from other people shouldn’t lead you; it should only confirm what God has already said to you. 9. Commit to never quit. Quitting is not an option. Once you’ve moved, don’t move again until God speaks to you. Stay with it. Walk it out. Don’t quit. So many people have so much potential, but they get uncomfortable and they quit. If you want to win, you should always be stretching. 10. Get ready to embrace bigger things. Your ability to see the big picture will keep growing as you change and grow on the inside. You’ll pick up on even more opportunities. For more principles, check out this FREE video on success.
By Drenda Keesee 14 Feb, 2024
Reading Time 2 mins 59 secs – A stuffed toy laid in the road at the scene of the accident. As we passed, the Lord spoke to me, “ Okay, this is your last warning. Are you going to continue this? You know you are opening the door to the enemy.” Gary and I had had a disagreement just before we had left the house for our family road trip. And there we were six hours in and we’d barely said a word to one another. Six hours. You think driving from Ohio to Tennessee is a long stretch of highway? Try doing it while giving someone the silent treatment. One word: torture. Then we passed the accident. Gary and I both felt the same conviction when we passed it, especially because it clearly involved children. But... pride. We knew what we were doing wasn’t good. (What kind of example is it to your children to ignore each other?) But neither of us wanted to lay down our pride. I kept hearing the voice of the Lord, and I’d think, No, I’m not going to fix this thing, because then I’ll have to talk to him. It was almost a competition to see who could hold our grudge for the longest. But strife is dangerous stuff. What is strife? Drama, conflict, friction, disagreement, bickering, arguing, bad blood, disputes… whichever words you use to describe it, it’s dangerous. Whether it’s between you and your spouse, you and your child, you and a friend, you and a family member, or you and a coworker, you don’t want to let strife remain in your life. The Bible says that where there is strife, there is confusion and there is every evil work (James 3:16). Our small argument between Gary and I had gone unchecked and had escalated, and neither one of us were listening to the voice of the Lord. And there were consequences for our strife and outright disobedience. About an hour after we passed the accident, a car pulled out in front of our vehicle, and we were in what could have been a very serious car accident. I started yelling the name of Jesus, and God supernaturally protected our entire family. Initially, it looked as though there were going to be serious issues. They told us our son’s spleen might rupture. I was pregnant, and the doctors worried that I might lose the baby. Through all of these things, we stood on the Word of God, and we all came out unharmed, including the young preacher’s son who had pulled out in front of us (he was in disobedience at that moment too). Even in the midst of this difficult situation, through our prayers, standing on God’s Word, and our children’s words to the medical personnel, we had opportunities to minister and impact the little county hospital we had to visit. The enemy tried to take us out, but he lost. We were responsible for opening the door to the enemy. But the name of Jesus is more powerful than our mistakes and circumstances, and that is what kept us protected. You MUST stay on guard and not allow strife in your life, with anyone. How? Here are just three quick tips: Bite your tongue. You don’t have to say everything you think. Don’t lash out or give the silent treatment. Work on communicating with others in a healthy way. Repent quickly and forgive quickly. Take responsibility; admit when you’re wrong. Say you’re sorry and ask for forgiveness. Don’t hold onto hurts. Forgive as you’ve been forgiven by Jesus.
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